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Listen as we discuss “so you think you’re ready to get married” live on the Let’s Chat Radio Show with callers.
By Uncle P.
Let’s face it. Relationships are hard.
The whole “two becoming one” thing sounds really good, and looks good on paper…but a funny thing is that when you try to make it work in real life, your dream of having a ”Little house on the Prairie” marriage, gives way to the reality that your marriage is more like “Nightmare on Elm Street”.
What went wrong? How did you get to this point? The sad reality is that maybe the marriage was doomed to failure even before it got started. Maybe you should have put off the marriage for a while, or maybe not married at all.
Marriage is more than he being “long and strong, stacked and packed”. She needs to have more than “hips, lips and fingertips”. What you need is a marriage ready checklist. What? Yep… a marriage checklist: one for him, and one for her. If he does not score at least 3 points, then throw him back, ’cause he ain’t ready.
Today I want to share a 3 point checklist to tell if a man is ready to be married.
#1. Does He Have His Own Place?
By own place, does he have a mortgage, rental or lease agreement in HIS name? Living with his boy, mamma or other “hookups” should be a deal breaker. When you are grown, you got your own. It shows responsibility, ambition and drive. Anything else is just a comfy excuse…..
#2. Does He Have A Job?
Far too many brothers use the excuse that there are no jobs, X is holding me down from getting ahead, or my all time favorite, I am in between jobs right now…. Really? Yeah…. Do you really expect a man to support you, if he cannot support himself?
#3. Does He Have a Value System For His Life?
Ok…He has his own place, and a nice job, but he still has one more test to pass. What are his values? What are the do’s and don’t for his life? Every person should have some type of moral compass that says what is, and is not right.
My cousin Rashad is a classic example. He is young and successful on a NATIONAL scale. He makes millions of dollars on a regular basis, and has very lucrative endorsement deals, but he is a sorry excuse for a husband, and never should have gotten married in the first place because he has no morals.
*His wife initially began dragging him out of strip clubs.
What self and marriage respecting husband would need to go to strip clubs, when he has his own private dancer ready to please and perform in his bed? Also, he would not have to worry about leaving with something he did not come with…. How disrepectful it is to have his wife come and get him out of a strip club to begin with….
*He celebrated his birthday in other cities without his wife.
Soon, he gave her half the money in the bank, moved out and filed for divorce. Did I fail to mention the kids they had together?
If she had checked in with the check list, she maybe might have avoided this train wreck of a marriage.
Simply put, If your intended does not have his own place, a job and a set of morals, he is not ready to be married.
Don’t worry fellas.. I have a little sumthin’ sumthin’ for you too…. Let’s turn the tables,and flip the script. Is SHE ready to be married? How do you tell the gold from the gold digggin’, Jersey chasin’, high maintenance H** that is only in it for what she can get, and is freely available to the highest bidder?